It's The Calm

I talked to Mom today.  She seemed in good spirits.  When I called she had some visitors that were just leaving.  She told me that they were all having a laugh at her expense because she keeps doing "stupid stuff", as she put it.  She said she keeps going into the wrong room of the house.  She tells stories about people she's talked to and doesn't remember if she was face to face or on the phone with them.  She can't type, she can't text, she can't spell.  She can't be alone.

She didn't once mention dying.  That's an improvement from when she first received the news.

It was nice to hear her laughing.  Even if it was at her own expense. 

Tomorrow she and Dad have an appointment with a Neurosurgeon.  I don't know his name, but I know that they are in the process of making sure they have the right Neurosurgeon before they proceed.  They've already seen one, and they didn't feel right.  They have a pretty good idea about the one they're seeing tomorrow, so hopefully we will have some more answers after that.

We still don't know what kind of cancer it is, or, as my dad put it, "if this 'thing' has a name".  We don't have a prognosis; we are just clinging to hope & faith at this early point in the game.

One thing mom said tonight was how much better she feels after getting so much rest.  She has been napping at her leisure, and getting pretty good sleep at night.  She feels more clarity than just a few days ago.

As far as Dad is concerned... well, he's just... Dad.  Being the rock for her, all the while trying to be the communicator to all of the concerned friends and family.  He's juggling a full time job, the normal household duties, phone calls, arrangements, appointments, dates, times, and everything else that's just "day-to-day".  I'll tell you what, I don't know how he does it.  He is seemingly juggling everything quite well, but asking for help when it gets to be too much.

We are taking things one day at a time.  One appointment at a time.  One phone call at a time.  One moment at a time.  It helps no one if we are all so overwhelmed and fall apart.  I'm trying to keep the information I have to give at bay, so as not to overload him.  I sent him 2 emails and one text today with names of highly recommended Neurosurgeons and Oncologists. 

The response I got back? 

"I'm starting to feel information overload". 

My response?

"Ok". 

My bad.  Sometimes I get so eager to help, as I guess most people would, that I forget what else he has on his plate. 

Once she gets established with a Neurosurgeon, and we set a date for surgery, or whatever comes next, then we can move on to the next task.

This is all new to all of us.  We are all just learning how to deal with something of this magnitude.  We have no idea what's around the next corner, but even though we don't know what to expect, we'll still be ready to face it.  What other choice is there?

I feel this is the calm before the storm.  And things are pretty chaotic right now.  Anyone who's been through this exact thing knows from their own experience what lies ahead.  Of course, every case is different, but the process is similar.

I cannot put into words the meaning of all of the prayers and thoughtful words of support from everyone - at least everyone in my world.  I cannot imagine the outpouring in their world.  Thank you so much for reading, passing the word along, praying, making meals, calling, checking in... you name it.  THANK YOU.

I will hopefully have an update tomorrow with the outcome of their appointment. 

Hopefully we can prepare for the next step.